My best friend

So Momma Tan has made her departure from Leuven this morning.

Even after 11 hours, I am still on the verge of crying when I think about it. That moment when I held her tiny frame in my arms, before the train conductor blew the whistle to signal the retreat of the train from the grey-scaled platforms. That moment when we embraced each other with a seemingly suffocating hug to bid each other farewell. That moment when tears unknowingly streamed down our cheeks…

Gawd, I am such a loser (runs to grab some tissue)

And of all days, I have a full day of lectures in school spanning across 7 hours. It was tough to constantly fight back any sudden whirlwind of emotions. But anyway, my mind kept drifting off to ponder about many things once more. And then I realized I have no friend who was close enough to know of every single thing that has happened, and is happening in my life. Nobody except my momma. Before she left, she hugged me and said “Thanks for treating me not like your mother, but as one of your friends.” And somehow that crushed my sanity, and I started to wail like a 12-month old baby who hadn’t eaten in forever.

It dawned on me that she was not just one of my friends. She was, and is my best friend. Realizing that a couple of hours after her departure was sure not helping my swell eyes contract its moisture.

So yes, this is my mother who has sacrificed so much for not just me, but our entire family. And she is also the woman whom I look up to so much.

I miss her. I miss my daddy. I miss my siblings. I miss Singapore and everyone back at home.

Just let me leave this place already, please. #homesick